Reflections and Gratitude from 2016

Although the children are still on holiday, we've put up the Christmas decorations and are focusing on the New Year. Every year Adam's office shuts down entirely for the week between Christmas and New Year's. Every year I am extremely grateful for this time of retreat and family bonding. We stay home and do whatever suits our fancy. We play games, read books, stay up late and sleep in. This year we also went on a hike at Dinosaur Valley State Park. Paul, Adam, and Claire have worked on mastering our original Nintendo Mario Brothers and I've read almost a book a day. Because our schedule is so busy and inundated during the rest of the year, I treasure this time every year.

I've compiled a list of 2016 gratitude and reflections. Here it is, in no particular order:

1. Emotionally and physically healthy children
The kids are growing rapidly. Claire has inherited my large feet and is now firmly in the women's shoe section. Paul is still long and lean and in constant motion. They are both healthy and active and I am so grateful. I'm also grateful for their emotional health and ability to navigate the world. Regularly we are in situations with unknown people and instead of retreating, the children engage. They make friends everywhere we go and learn about others' stories. Every time I see situations like that, I know that we have done well and that no matter what the future holds, our children will march forward with flying colors.

2. My husband
Adam and I have been together since college, and I am constantly grateful for our shared history and partnership. I love having jokes that are almost 20 years old and that no one else in the world would understand. I love how he both understands me but also sees the world from a different angle. My right-brained leanings balance out his left-brain strengths and vice-versa.

3. Pokemon Go
We have had so much fun with Pokemon Go this year. The kids don't have their own phones yet, so we all use my phone. Claire, Paul, and I pass the phone back and forth. I have enjoyed learning a bit of the intricacies of the Pokemon world. More than that, I am grateful for the sharing and teamwork that playing this encourages.

4. Books
For Christmas, Paul received the Platypus Penguin Detective series. This in itself just makes me smile. Over the holidays I reorganized several of my bookshelves and read so many books that have been sitting around collecting dust. I have always been a reader and I'm so thankful for the wide-variety of books that we have around the house. I had my nose in a book almost the entire break.

5. Interactions with the homeless
Several years ago, our church had a ministry for homeless women. Once a week during the coldest and hottest months of the year, we would host 12 women for an overnight stay. Our family loved this program because we were able to interact and build relationships with homeless people in a comfortable setting. We had a few favorites that the kids looked forward to seeing. One of these favorites was Terry. Just before Christmas, I began to see Terry around our neighborhood. I spoke with her every time. I don't know if she remembered us or not, but when I saw her a couple days before Christmas, I handed her some money and called her by name. She accepted with gratitude and wonder.

This week we took Adam to lunch one day. As we were waiting at a red light, we watched a man pick up a half-eaten tortilla off the ground. He began to eat it. He then found another tortilla and then an empty to-go box also on the ground. He began wiping the tortilla on the box, trying to mop up any sauce that was there. We all had compassion for that man. After lunch the kids boxed up their leftovers, made sure to get a fork, and we went back to find the man. We were unable to find him. However, we did find another homeless man and offered our leftovers to him. He accepted with thanks.

I'm not sure if some policy changes have sent more homeless people to the streets or if I am just noticing who has always been there. However, every interaction I have with a homeless person reminds me of how small my problems are. I'm also always filled with a desire to do more.

6. Family exercise
The kids are in running club at school. I join them every Wednesday and we are training for the Cowtown 5k. I had planned on doing some running, but it hasn't worked out that way. Instead, I'm part of the walkers group. I love watching my own children race ahead of me and run with confidence. I also love walking and occasionally jogging with other children who like to share whatever's on their minds. I feel honored that they trust me enough to share and grateful for the opportunity to listen.

We went on a family hike on New Year's Eve. That was fun as well. I'm always grateful for our family adventures, especially when they take me places I wouldn't have chosen myself.

7. Seminary
I am in the middle of my Master of Divinity program at Brite Divinity School. Several times this fall semester I felt overwhelmed and defeated. It's such a long process. However, I kept working hard and even though I threw my hands in the air at my finals and settled on "good enough," I earned an A in both my classes. I also received encouragement over the holidays and am now ready to tackle the spring semester. I am grateful for my particular seminary in all the ways I am challenged to rethink and listen to other viewpoints. The metaphor I can best describe it is that seminary is like a new pair of glasses. You don't even think about how you see things normally until you receive these special seminary glasses. Now all the sudden you see the world with new eyes. This changes and challenges much of what was taken for granted before, even my own self-knowledge.

8. Implementing life skills in the children
This fall, I taught my kids how to do their own laundry. That doesn't mean they will do it all the time, but it does mean that if they are asking if some particular item is clean, I can tell them to go start a load. More than not, they are washing and drying their own clothes now. I'm taking care of the bleach and whatever lands in my hamper.

Because my job at the Wesley includes some nights away from the family dinner table, Claire has stepped up her cooking skills and began providing dinner. She enjoys cooking and is increasing in skills and confidence. Not to be left behind, Paul is working on his culinary skills as well. Last night he made chicken tacos for the family.

I am so grateful for kids that are smart, confident, and capable. By the time they are off to college, they will be ready.

9. Our pets
Capt. Midnight Sugar Dot Express is currently snoring on the couch. He's been a good dog. This past year we also added two  hamsters and a fish to our pet list. The kids bought the hamsters and fish with their own money and the best part is, they take care of them as well! I haven't had to clean one fish bowl or hamster cage. I can just pet them when I like and leave the rest to the kids.

10. Holiday reconnections
Over Christmas break, we have seen so many people we love and don't get to see normally. More than once on Christmas Eve I looked around at the family gatherings and was filled with gratitude. Christmas is so nice because no matter how much we are rushing around like chickens with our heads cut off, at some point we all stop, and join together to celebrate and share love. I am grateful.

As we put both feet in 2017, I've looked back on the past year with gratitude, but now I am looking forward with that same gratitude. I'm anxious to see all the ways we will grow and change in the new year.

Our family hike at Dinosaur Valley State Park.

Gratitude and Raising the White Flag of Surrender

Want to know about the Protestant vs. Catholic Reformation in Europe? Not able to sleep? Haven't read the words "I would rather see a cow defecate" in a religious setting in a while?
I can fix all your problems with one swoop here!  Here's the link to my midterm, which includes a quote from a Protestant saying he would rather see a cow defecate than sit through another mass. I hoping to get at least a laugh for that inclusion.
I haven't been writing here because I've been attempting to tackle that beast.  Writing for seminary is different than other writing I've had to do, and I'm grateful for that. I'm always trying to improve my writing skills and so far, Brite Divinity School has asked me to stretch and stretch and I think I'm starting to grow.
I wanted to express my gratitude for everyone who helped me get through those crazy two weeks where I was reading and writing at every spare second I had. Adam has had an extremely tough work schedule for the last month so he's spent every spare second at the office. There were several days that I was trying to write my paper, work my two jobs, take care of my two kids, and I just wasn't doing anything very well.  I am humbled and thankful for everyone that helped me over the hump.  For those of you that sent me encouraging notes or hugged me and helped me regain my balance, I am so grateful. To my special friend that brought me dinner, thank you. To my friends who took the kids to the movies and dinner so I could write, thank you. To my kids who put up with a stretched-too-thin mother for two weeks, thanks for your patience. To my husband, thank you for understanding.
Besides all the new facts that are now crammed into my brain is a realization that I absolutely cannot pursue a Master of Divinity degree without support. When the time to write my final comes around, I will remember that and plan ahead.  I will recognize that trying to fit all that homework into the space between the time the children sleep and I am awake just isn't possible.  I will schedule uninterrupted work time by planning entertainment for the kids outside of the house with people that love them.  I will ask for help before I have to raise the white flag and admit defeat.
In some ways, I had an easier time writing this paper than the last one, so I am also hopeful that next semester I will be even more fluent in the ways to write for seminary.
Thank you to all my loved ones for your prayers and support.

Day One of the Rest of My Life

Yesterday was my first day of orientation at Brite Divinity School.  I have enrolled in the Master of Divinity program.
My enthusiasm for entering this phase in my life is a little bit intimidating to those who don't know me,

so I try to keep half of it to myself and share the other half. I'm also about to Google synonyms for the word excited so I can stop saying, "I'm excited!"

My entry into seminary has been a community effort. Friends encouraged me to explore the idea. Friends helped me with my application by writing letters and proofing my essays. Friends bought banana bread from me to help me pay for my tuition. Friends contributed privately to help.
So when I am standing at Brite Divinity School, it's not just me standing there. I'm being pushed forward and lifted up by loved ones. I know I'm in exactly the right place and I know I'm not alone.
When I met with my adviser, he informed me that the class I wanted had only one opening left. "Go, Sarah!" he told me as he waved me out of his office.
When I got to the computer I needed to register on, another community was quickly formed to help me register. I had left my password at home, I had never used the system before, and I had no less than five people helping me. One helped me reset my password. One helped me find the course number and navigate through the screens. One helped me with my student ID number, also left at home. Others looked on and offered tips. After all that, I was too late. The opening in the class was filled.
Back to my adviser, I selected a new course. The team rallied again to register me and then we realized I didn't have the prerequisites to take that course.  We recruited another team member to find another course for me.
Finally, we enrolled me in History of Christianity II, Reformation and Modern.  It meets on Thursday nights at 6:45 p.m. The professor is a published author. This is the perfect class for me and it fits into my schedule without turning the world upside down.
I'm only taking one class this semester so I can get my feet wet and not turn the world completely upside down. I want to ease back into scholarship and learn how it fits in my schedule.
I wanted to provide an update for all of you who have supported me thus far. Thank you. I am humbled and grateful beyond words. You helped me pay for my books and tuition for my first semester of seminary. Thank you.
More than financial aid, though, I would like to thank you for the encouragement and support as I enter this new phase of my life. When I feel overwhelmed, all I have to do is picture the faces of everyone who has gotten me here and I am renewed and encouraged to go forward. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Small Miracles and Grace

Long ago, before I joined the Methodist church, I understood grace to be poise and put-togetherness. Audrey Hepburn, but not Sarah....No, I've never had that kind of grace.

Now I have a different understanding of the word. Getting something you don't deserve; that's grace. I am constantly the recipient of that kind of grace. Just this last week has been full of grace. Here are three small miracles that have happened here at our house:

1. We have a vinyl-lined pool that desparately needed a new liner. We've been worried about replacing it since the original quote we got on it was almost $4,000. We just had a guy do it for half of that. We're budgeting every dollar since I quit working last year, so that was a small miracle the money we'd been saving for that was more than enough.

2. Our computer died. Adam can get it to work for 10 or 15 minutes at a time by doing something to a battery inside, but that's about all. It's about to be dead forever. After replacing the pool liner, we really don't have money for a new computer. I was telling my friend Alli this and she said that her husband was about to sell a good laptop for $100. I jumped at the opportunity. The laptop works great and is actually an upgrade from the dead computer!

3. Every year, since we've been married, we've owed money on our taxes. We feared this year would be our biggest year yet because we received gas lease money in the fall and would have to pay taxes on that. Adam did our taxes yesterday and we actually get $200 back! Now that's a miracle!

Audrey Hepburn be damned. My life is full of grace! (and gratitude)