Innocence Lost

Yesterday was a heart-crushing day for me.
Claire, in a unexplained move, broke apart a puzzle Paul had completed.  Then they yelled at each other.  She stuck up her middle finger at him and he followed suit.
I was in the kitchen making dinner.  They were supposed to be getting ready for baths. At first, all I knew is that they had been yelling at each other.
Paul rushed in the kitchen to be the police reporter and tell me about the crimes that had just taken place.  Claire rushed in to label her brother a tattle tale.  I immediately separated them to find out the details.
Claire confessed to all crimes, and said she stuck up her middle finger because "it felt good to stretch it out." She knows what that  means because kids at school showed it to her and even explained it.  I had talked with her about it previously so she could understand how mean and hurtful and vulgar it was.
When I talked to Claire, she also told me Paul had done the same thing.  Paul is four.  He didn't even know what the middle finger was until his sister taught him just yesterday.  When I confronted him about it, he initially denied it but then told me the truth.
I didn't yell at them.  In classic Love and Logic style, I told them I was sad but not to worry because we'll figure out what the consequence is later.
It turns out the consequence is a sad mommy, no night-night stories, uncomfortable silence, and no television for an extended period of time.
I sent them to bed immediately after dinner, at 6:30 p.m.  They were in bed for ten minutes or so when Claire realized I hadn't put curlers in her hair.  Adam or I have curled her hair every day this week and she's looked gorgeous at school.  I told her no, I was too sad to curl her hair.  Not tonight.
What makes me more sad than the actual events that took place, awful as they were, is that there is no way I can protect them from the world.  Just one month ago, Claire, age 6, had never seen someone raise the middle finger.  We don't watch much television around here, and when we do it's Power Rangers or Wheel of Fortune.  Adam and I are very conscious about what the kids are exposed to and even our behavior in front of them.  But I cannot follow my child around the playground at school every day.
Sure, I could home-school my children, but eventually they will have to learn  how to live in the real world and not under Mama's protective wing.  I do believe it's better for them to learn how to live in society now where they can grow up with other children and gradually learn about the world, rather than protecting them at home until a determined date when I thrust them out into the world unaware.
So all I can do is explain as much as possible and offer them love.  I silently held Claire last night for at least 15 minutes while she cried.  Paul fell immediately asleep and apologized several times.
It's hard being a parent, because even if you paint the world with rainbows and butterflies, sometimes darkness seeps in.  Like Eve and the apple, once world-knowledge is obtained, it isn't lost.  This is just a fact of life.  My kids are growing up.  I can be in hiding and denial or I can work hard to help them understand the world around them.