Five Minute Friday: Bloom

Each Friday, blogger mom Lisa Jo Baker invites writers to write on a prompt for five minutes and link up to her blog.  Since I've been out of my writing rhythm, I thought I'd contribute today.  Want to read her stuff? Click here.

Bloom

2014 has been a year of big changes for me. I entered seminary and we left our church home for my new job. I started recognizing my emotional and social needs and acting to fulfill them. I began to dream out loud and start working toward some life goals. I accepted help for tuition, childcare, and Sarah care. I can honestly say that I am happier today than I was one year ago today. I feel like I'm beginning to bloom.

I'm on the horizon of the rest of my life and I am so happy to be here. Summer is a difficult time for me emotionally. I don't have a set routine, I'm with the kids 24/7, and I feel adrift. My momentum from spring has carried over into summer, and I'm more grounded this summer than in years past.

One day a week, I schedule a stay-at-home day and we stick to it. We don't leave the house at all. This has given us all breathing space as well as time to play with ignored toys and complete some household projects. On the eve of our stay-at-home day, I remind the kids we won't be leaving the house the next day and they always cheer. I was reminded of the importance of our home when we went to Sea World this summer. Claire said, "This is my favorite place on Earth after our home!" I am so pleased that our children both recognize the home as a place of safety, comfort, and love.

I started my new job right before the end of the school year, so going to church to work or worship still has an allure of newness about it. I'm learning new tasks and the kids haven't explored every corner yet. One day a week a kind friend plays with them and another day a week I bring them to work with me.

This week I took some time to go back to Brite Divinity School to take care of housekeeping matters and remind myself that I am a student. I ordered my textbooks for the fall semester and delighted in the exciting titles, Our Search for Spirituality, African-American Spirituality, and others. I love basking in the learning environment there and surrounding myself with intelligent people of faith.  I can't wait for classes to resume in fall.

Since my entry into seminary was a suprise to everyone, even me, I didn't enter graduate school with a savings account to pay for tuition. I am baking my way through my degree, selling banana bread to raise tuition money. I am so thankful for friends that blessed me by buying a loaf of banana bread or offering a contribution. My first semester was debt-free and I am a few hundred dollars away from baking my way through a debt-free fall.  This week I've baked about 15 loaves.

Every summer I am in a frenzy to create new activities to keep us busy.  This year I've slowed down, and we have all benefitted from that. I'm not breaking my neck to rush us to an educational activity across town. I'm not rearranging our schedule to squeeze in an inconvenient trip to a local museum. This week I had planned on taking the kids to the art museum, but they both told me they'd rather stay home, so we did.  I've released my grip a bit on the schedule and life hasn't fallen into chaos. I've let many fun opportunities pass us by without regret.

The result of this throwing caution to the wind has been a happier home, blooming with life and love and smelling like banana bread. Now I'm off to bake some more.