The Joys of Motherhood

In conversation with a friend recently, she marveled at my motherhood. "I don't know how you do it," she said. Being a parent seems like a daunting task to her.

It's true. Being a parent requires everything you have and more. In this day and age, parents are becoming more honest and more vocal about the difficulties of parenthood. Perfect facades are being laid down for real discussion about struggling to raise children. Books and blogs focused on frustrations of parenthood are published daily. I'm glad that parenting conversations are shifting toward more truth, but this shift also seems to shift toward more negative discussion. I want to be an honest voice to remind us of joy.

When complaining about the struggles of potty-training, we need to remember the joy and hilarity of the Potty Dance. Potty-training was the hardest parenting task I have faced yet. I was often frustrated and downright mad. But I also laughed until I couldn't breathe when my children made it to the bathroom in time and started succeeding. Everyone in the house stopped what they were doing to dance in celebration.

Homework is hard and some days my daughter comes home not wanting to do it at all. "Can I please just have some play time and then do my homework? Why do I have to do this?" Sometimes I have to firmly redirect her back to her task. Without homework, though, light bulb moments often escape my notice. When we regularly engage in educational activities, I get to see the light in Claire and Paul's eyes as they grasp a concept for the first time.

Having kids is like being members of an exclusive club. My husband Adam and I have shared private jokes for years, but now we have four people in on the joke instead of just two. At the grocery store Paul can say a line or make a face and as soon as I understand the reference, I find myself laughing out loud. In the church pew, Adam often says something to us that makes us all shake with laughter.

Without children, reading is a solitary activity. At our house, even if Adam is reading his own book, he will soon find at least one child in his lap. Bedtime stories are a sacred ritual. Snuggling while reading a good book is ecstasy. On times when I have a few moments to read my own book, I feel strange if there isn't a little person next to me or in my lap.

Being a parent adds newness to every aspect of your world. Items on a shelf that I have long overlooked now spark wonder and curiosity in a child. My daily routines are examined and discussed. Nothing escapes notice. It is exhausting, and sometimes I just want to complete a simple task like getting a glass of water without explaining how the water filter works. But if no one is there to ask, I sometimes forget the magic of everyday life.

I love being a mother. I overwhelmed with love and gratitude when I am walking and suddenly find a small hand clasped in my own. I often wake in the middle of the night to find someone has sneaked in and a little arm is draped over me in affection. I regularly have reason to jump on a trampoline. I
pick dandelions and blow the seeds from the stem. I've always been goofy, but it's much more socially acceptable to be goofy with children. Yesterday I was in a sword fight that didn't have any bloodshed. Outgoing children means friends are collected everywhere, and it is rare to leave Wal-Mart without a new acquaintance.

The list goes on and on. Motherhood adds a layer of intensity to all aspects of my life, but it also adds a huge layer of joy.